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Post by The Collector on Oct 12, 2006 16:03:10 GMT
'incerting stuffing into live foxes' repyed Kevin 'It's not the greatest hobby, but it keeps me fit...and removes my sexual tension'
all around him the work stopped as...
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 12, 2006 16:30:04 GMT
Kevin noticed his uncle Chris had been in the room all along and had heard the whole thing.
You could tell by the look on Chris's face that he was disgusted by Kevin's perverted antics with he foxes. As a good will gesture, Kevin offered to buy Chris a pint of lager. Chris accepted and also asked if Kevin could get him some nuts. Kevin smiled and said.......
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Post by Lieutenant Columbo on Oct 12, 2006 17:47:52 GMT
"aye go on then".
And he bought him some.
;D
N.
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 12, 2006 18:15:51 GMT
thanks kevin said uncle chris,it,s a pity these are not nobbys nuts,i always liked a good suck on nobbys nuts, anyway kevin what's all this about stuffing foxes, you into taxidermy or just for the pleasure of.........
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 12, 2006 18:23:24 GMT
being a complete and utter pervert?", "Both" said Kevin.
"Well I'm going to tell your mam of you" threatened Chris, as he chewed his salty nuts.
"Well, if you tell my mam about that, I'm going to spill the beans about you" blackmailed Kevin.
"about what?" chris asked.
"Remember that day way back in 1994... When we went fishing, and you.....
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Post by Lieutenant Columbo on Oct 12, 2006 19:30:20 GMT
"Didn't catch anything?"
"Yes I do" replied Keving, brooding - "and I'd rather not talk about it".
Silence entered the room, but Chris was having none of it; he opened the door and let it back out again.
"The worst thing about that day" Kevin began, "was...
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 12, 2006 19:43:26 GMT
you, making me put your maggot in my mouth,saying it would keep it warm and it would wriggle about a lot more, then how the smell of fish reminded you of..........
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Post by The Collector on Oct 12, 2006 21:19:59 GMT
Wet Fish, Which was logical I suppose'
Kevin looked over at his Uncle who was fiddling with his...
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 12, 2006 22:27:34 GMT
nuts. After all, they were both still in the pub and only discussing blackmailing terms.
"Ok, you win Kevin, I'll keep quiet about you this time, but I won't forget this threat you little blackmailing get" Chris stated, angrily!
After this, Kevin decided he'd had enough of the gravedigger's annual dinner dance and headed on home. As he left the pub he noticed...
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 13, 2006 6:52:35 GMT
agnes the barmaid,his first love,years had passed since , neil,eric the cat, agnes and himself had spent time together, now with neil gone,and eric still feeling a little flat he looked at agnes and though could i...........
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 13, 2006 8:46:01 GMT
persuade Agnes to help me stuff foxes? He approached Agnes and smiled. Agnes did not smile back. "Hello Agnes, not seen you for years. How are you?" asked Kevin.
"How am I? How am I", she shouted... "My life's been sh*t since we split up. I can't believe I'm working as a barmaid in the 'flying ashtray'. It's all your fault you know...." she went on, but Kevin interrupted her mid-speech.
"Do you like foxes?" enquired Kevin, ignoring everything she'd said.
"Oh! Foxes now is it... When we were together it was........
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 13, 2006 9:08:24 GMT
any thing that moved,well stuff you kevin,look at me i thought you were the one to take me away from all of this,but just look, i'm still a barmaid,still living in graveyard row and look at you hiding behind some false mexican moustache,but agnes i'm not hiding behind a moustache replied kevin, iv'e been auditiong for a part in the new film the........
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Post by The Collector on Oct 13, 2006 9:33:11 GMT
Mutant killer slugs, this is one of them' 'I've seen your Slug' she laughed 'not very impressive'.
Whith this Kevin picked up an ashtray and...
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Post by bluebottle on Oct 13, 2006 10:24:52 GMT
some blind mans guide dog and started juggling.
Chris had come in the room hearing the comotion.
The blind man who was confused as to what the hell was happening reached out to where his dog was and grabbed Chris's salty nut's.
At this point the landord said...
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 13, 2006 15:50:10 GMT
that's it your all barred, barred said agnes if kevin's barred you can get youself a new barmaid cos i'm outta here, come on kevin said agnes you can take me home,as they left the flying ashtray the blind man was still pleading his innocence, saying he hadn't seen a thing,kevin and agnes were now strolling arm in arm towards graveyard row, when suddenly they saw approaching them.........
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