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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 13, 2006 15:58:42 GMT
a big red fox, which looked very cunning indeed. Kevin smiled and looked at Agnes, who had now seemed to have forgotten about their argument earlier.
"I'm gonna have to stuff that before I go to bed tonight!", said Kevin, but as he said this, the fox buggered off. Kevin was now looking very disappointed and turned to Agnes. He had a very eerie look on his face...
"Well, I'm gonna have to suff something tonight because I'm in the mood now" said Kevin in a sinister voice.
Agnes, who was now frightened.......
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Post by mckenzie on Oct 13, 2006 16:41:52 GMT
began to get the shakes,she had never seen kevin in this kind of mood,but suddenly from around the corner came eric the cat,kevin was so overcome to see eric,he forgot all about agnes,(which came as a great relief to her) eric my friend where have you been,ive been keeping a low profile kevin (he was a cartoon cat so he could talk) i,m trying to find out what really happened to neil and i think i've stumbled onto........
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 13, 2006 23:31:41 GMT
a stale piece of white dog shit, and that's quite rare these days!"
"that's amazing" said Kevin, very enthusiastically. "Scoop it up and pop it in a bag"
"But Why?" asked Eric...
"F*ck knows", replied Kevin, "I think the authors of this story have totally lost the plot.
"What plot?" asked Eric, sarcastically.
"I don't remember now..." reminisced Kevin, "It seemed so long ago since it all started, when it was all about Neil the LSD addict who had his head chopped off and eaten at some silly annual dance thingy in a scabby pub in Scholes..."
"You're right" said Eric, "We must move on now"...
"Enough of this silliness!" said a voice in the distance.... "Don't you realise this post is a total waste of time and effort, it's got this story nowhere.."
"I know that voice" said Kevin, "it's...............
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Post by Grimly Fiendish on Oct 15, 2006 14:07:00 GMT
"Mr. T!" finished Eric.
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Post by The Collector on Oct 16, 2006 13:22:22 GMT
'Crazy Foo's' Said mr.T 'Don't you know drugs are bad for you!'
Kevin gave him a glass of milk.
T collapsed into a heap, While he was out cold Kevin...
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 16, 2006 17:39:56 GMT
threw him into a nearby skip. He couldn't be arsed arranging a flight for him, just to get the response of "Howd I get here!". That would've just been silly.
In the meantime, Eric had also had a drink of the drugged milk, he too was out cold.
Kevin thought to himself "Where the hell did that milk come from anyway?", then suddenly remembered...
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Post by bluebottle on Oct 16, 2006 19:04:50 GMT
The druken episode the night before involving 2 ferrets, a bask some suspenders, a group of passing hells angels, a game of twister,
3 bottles of Taquilla and big Maureen from the Kebab house. With his his thoughts racing he decided to head home....
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Post by The Collector on Oct 17, 2006 10:36:46 GMT
For a W*nk, but when he arrived at home he found...
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 17, 2006 16:22:29 GMT
Uncle Chris in bed with his mum....
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Post by The Collector on Oct 17, 2006 19:45:05 GMT
and his Uncle and several others he didn't know.
'What do you think your doing' He asked....
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Post by Stan Butler on Oct 20, 2006 12:08:42 GMT
"We're re-inacting a couple of scenes from that film 'Rita, Sue & Bob Too'" replied his mum.
"Well..." Kevin responded... "That 'gang bang' was only a dance.... Which one of you's fat f*ckin Mavis anyway?". A little chubby woman with glasses on emerged from beneath the sheets... "that's me love, I'm Mavis. Would you like to join us?" she asked.
Before kevin could answer, there was knock at the door...
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Post by The Collector on Oct 20, 2006 12:16:58 GMT
'Open up it's the police'
Kevin answered the door at it was a copper with his truncion in his hand...
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Post by Stan Butler on Nov 3, 2006 23:18:37 GMT
"Yes officer... Can I help you?" Asked Kevin all innocently.
"First of all..." Started the policeman..
"Why has taken you since the 20th of October to answer the door. It's now November the 3rd and I'm bloody well cold"
Kevin looked at the policeman puzzled, then realised what he meant!
"Come in..." Said Kevin in a very camp but friendly manner
"I'll put the kettle on and make you a nice cup of tea"
"I don't want a f*cking cup of tea", Shouted the policeman "I'm here to tell you...........
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Post by The Collector on Nov 4, 2006 14:05:23 GMT
'It's raining men'
Kevin fainted with joy but luckily for him he had a soft landing on...
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Post by BobbyRazzle on Nov 9, 2006 11:11:26 GMT
the policeman's helmet!
Kevin soon awoke and smiled, but the copper wasn't pleased about the damage to his helmet and arrested Kevin. He read him his rights and charged him with...
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